Friday, January 13, 2012

Self Care While Grieving


It is common to need breaks from the overwhelming emotions one feels while grieving.  Taking care of your needs in no way dishonors the memories of your loved one and is, in fact, one of the best things you can do for yourself during the grief process.


Following are some ideas which may provide a temporary relief while grieving:

·        Get some sun.  Bathe in the warmth.
·        Take the phone off the hook and embrace the silence.
·        When you are worried, set up a specific time of the day to “worry” for 20 minutes.  Set a timer and stick to your plan.
·        Do something you’re good at and appreciate your individual uniqueness.
·        Take a warm bath using your favorite scents, burn aroma therapy candles.
·        Buy yourself or your loved one a gift—and have the clerk gift wrap it.  Choose the prettiest paper and bow.  Celebrate fond memories.
·        Wrap up in a warm blanket.  Put on relaxation tapes and sip on your favorite tea or hot chocolate.
·        Dress in comfortable clothing, find a rocking chair and “rock your troubles away.”
·        Play music that matches your mood.  Feel understood by the songs and singers who share your experiences.
·        Especially when you are feeling stressed and overwhelmed, forget about making “to do” lists, and at the close of each day, make your list of “what’s been done.”
·        Burn Russian amber or sandalwood incense, natural relaxation-enhancing scents.
·        Find something alive to care for:  plants, pets, fish, etc.
·        Eat at least one nourishing meal each day.
·        Put a fire in the fireplace and focus on yourself.  (You can add your favorite soft music to this).
·        Breathe—really breathe!  In through the nose, slowly out through the mouth.
·        Say “No” to something... (and “Yes” to yourself).
·        Try gentle exercise like yoga, tai chi, or walking.
·        Spend some time in nature.
·        Make a memory box, collage, or journal to store your thoughts and memories.
·        If you like creative expressions, consider painting, writing poetry, journaling, sewing or knitting.

Adapted from Chris Rothman, Ph.D.

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